Mother of the Year

This morning was a normal, rainy, gloomy morning.  Cale's backpack was ready, complete with the checks I stayed up writing and the homework he stayed up late finishing safely tucked in his folder in his backpack.  The kids were eating the breakfast of champions (cereal, milk and a banana) and I even had the neighbor girl's breakfast ready for her.  Her cereal was getting soggy though, I thought as I wondered where she was and why she was so late coming over. I try to call her mom, no answer.  Then Eric says he sees our neighbor Lisa leave, with all her kids. Hmmm, ODD!  So I try to call again, no answer.  I keep on with my morning, calling both of Elizabeth's parents, no answer, before I leave a little bit grouchy message that I was leaving for school.  Jenna and Cale get into the car nicely, and since we had the time, we went in the direction of daycare and not school.
Still normal, we went into Ann's to chat for a few before we headed to school. And here is where my official entry for Mother of the Year begins (sorry Shonda, you have competition for this prestigious award)...
Me:  Cale, time to go. Tell Sissy and Annie bye.
Ann:  Where are you taking Cale?
Me: Umm, to school!
Ann: There's no school today!
Me: What?  (long pause) Ooooohhhhh, there's not school today!  I guess I'm leaving Cale here!
Ann: Well, that's what I was planning on!
Me: Ooooohhhh, that explains why Elizabeth didn't come over!!!


WOW!!!  Now, let me remind you, I am a teacher at heart and have giggled at numerous parents for dropping their kids off on non-school days.  I have been upset and irritable at those who don't read the newsletters and calendars. And today, I was THAT mom!!!!!  Now, let me defend (if that's possible) myself with the following...

• I make the monthly calendar for Cale's classroom. Mrs. H sends me all the dates and I put it together in what I think is a pretty cute format for all the parents to print and oogle over all month long. I DO THAT!  I made a cute little text box inside the April 25th spot that says NO SCHOOL in bright spring colors.  What I am trying to say that I DO read the calendars and the memos and the newsletters, but this may only be implicating me for a crime of stupidity, instead of a defense!!
• One of the checks I stayed up last night writing for school was for the school carnival. It said on there, return by April 25th.  See, they forgot there was no school on April 25th when they made that form!  I am not alone!

I have since communicated with my dear neighbor Lisa, and she has confirmed that Elizabeth will be coming over in the morning, because there is school tomorrow.  I really hope Cale enjoyed his totally bonus day off of school today!!!  Thanks Annie for keeping me straight, and Lisa, just delete those voicemails. 

Happy Birthday to My Baby Boy, Who Thinks He is NOT My Baby Anymore



God has so far given us 6 wonderful years with our sweet Cale. We have seen him grow and learn so much in those short years. Short, yet it feels like forever ago when he first came, and I don't know what we did before we had him.  His smile brings joy to our hearts and to many others, so I'm told.  He has a loving soul, a crazy giggle that you can't help but love, and a spunky personality. His eyes are big and bright and blue and take in all the world has.  He is smart, sensitive and a full of emotion.  He is my Cale Owen. 

My sweet son, just minutes old.  You can see his birthmark on the side of his nose.  At first, all the doctors and nurses kept trying to clean it off, until they realized it was stuck on there. My first thought was that he would hate it when he got older, but that is not the case.  Now it is lighter and part of him so natural.  Shortly after Cale was born, his Grandpa Daymond passed away. I will never forget, at his funeral with my 10 day old son, this kind old man comes up to me and says, "Do you know your baby has a tick on his head?"  I, as nicely and quickly as I could, explained it was his birthmark.   

He was such a good snuggler!  He fell asleep so easily on your chest and would stay there as long as he could. It was a wonderful feeling of closeness and love and comfort.  How could you put him down to sleep in his bed if he slept so cozy like this????

Happy first birthday to Cale!!  We were at Red Robin, and we started a tradition for the next 4 years. Of course, this year, Mr. Opinionated wanted to go to Chuck E Cheese instead.  We'll try again for number 7.

He is 22 months old here, already showing his spunk and goofy side!  Playing with 2 binks at once?  Must be time for them to go bye-bye soon!  He was cracking himself up, by the way. 

It was about here when he started really experimenting with humor. I also have pictures of him wearing daddy's shoes and laughing so hard.  He was already trying to make us laugh too!

What a great memory this party is!!  Happy 4th birthday little man!  We were at Deanna Rose and it rained and rained and rained.  I was 6 months pregnant, giant and emotional, but this kid, well it is obvious, he is having the time of his life!  A little rain was not going to bring him down!  



Anther picture of Cowboy Cale, Age 4!!  He's been a cowboy for a couple of years by this point, and he has just received his first pony!!  I say first, because I hope he somehow will have another horse someday.  He is a cowboy at heart, which is a difficult task since he has grown up in the city!  Thanks to Papa Pappy for starting him watching old westerns at the young age of 2 and Uncle Jimmie for having all the horses and Charlie the pony, he learned early how to wear boots, tight jeans and a hat.  Gene Autry, if you are reading this, Cale would still like to invite you to his birthday party.

Do you feel the love?!?!  Well, although this picture doesn't do their love justice, he ADORES his sister.  You can read more about that here.  This is Cale at age 5 (and Jenna at age 1 as you can see). 

I will leave you with this final picture of my little man, in Florida this March, almost 6 years old and doing his professional model pose.  How can you NOT think he is absolutely adorable!?!?!

To my little man, I am so proud of the person you are becoming.  You are loved and treasured so so so much.  I love you a million, plus infinity!!   

What did YOU have for dinner 6 years ago???

We were at Applebee's.  I had the honey barbecue chicken with mashed potatoes. We had some kind of dessert, probably a chocolate cake or brownie with ice cream with chocolate drizzled all over.  Yum oh yum, It was an excellent meal, my favorite Applebee's dish at the time.  I had leftovers though, because I was a wee bit distracted.  I also had doctor's orders to eat a "light meal."  We were also running a wee bit behind to our 7pm check in at the hospital.  It was time to be induced!!

Earlier that day, I had lunch with some friends. They brought Goodcents over, yum!  At our mid afternoon doctor's appointment, Dr. Snider came in and said, "Well, I'll see you back at 7 tonight, we are going to induce."  I freaked out!  I had been on bed rest for high blood pressure for 2 weeks, it was only 2 weeks from my due date, and this shouldn't have come as such a shock to me!  We quickly sprung into action, making phone calls and last minute preparations.  Eric went back to work to wrap stuff up, and I went home to have a freak out panic attack because this was REALLY happening RIGHT NOW pack and let our friends and family know it was go time.  Yes, 2 weeks out and I hadn't even packed!  I even made an appointment for a massage. I wanted her to work on the pressure points for labor. I foolishly thought this was help move things along more quickly. 

It was a long night, with nurses coming in to bug me, check vitals on me and little man, and all sorts of things hooked up to me.  This was my first hospital experience, and I was slightly overwhelmed!  And a long night led to a much longer day....

Acceptance Speech

Recently I described the prize that I have WON!  WOO HOO for me, it was a tonsillectomy!  Well, with any great prize, there should be an acceptance speech.  So, here is it.

I just first want to thank my family for their support in the last couple of week.  My husband has been working weekends and late nights thanks to the recent hail storm, and on top of that, he is having to do more at home.  My mother was so lucky to get to take care of me the 1st couple days after surgery when I was my whiniest and most demanding.  BUT WAIT, there's more!  She also had the pleasure of taking care of Jenna, who had the stomach flu.  She did lots of running for me also, to Sonic for ice and slushes and to Price Chopper for sherbet, pudding and jello.  Then my mother in law got to take a turn and has been my care taker during the week.  She has had the opportunity to get the kids ready for school and daycare, take the kids, along with the neighbor girl to school, cook and clean all our meals, do some after school pick up and has managed to get my house clean too. We even found some counter tops that Eric and I thought were permanently covered in paper!  So, a giant thank you to them for taking all this good care of me and the kids.  And thank you to Dad and Larry for giving them to us so willingly during my time of no lifting and driving. 
My sweet grandparents have come to visit and brought beautiful flowers.  Kudos to my wonderful boss Suzy and my co-workers at the bank.  They all completely understood the importance of this surgery for Jenna's sake and have been uber supportive of this time off of work.  AND they also sent beautiful flowers.  The Lafferty's made me a GIANT tub of homemade vanilla ice cream, YUM!  My fiend Karen was our life saver a couple Saturdays ago by coming to get Cale and entertain him ALL day while Mommy and Jenna were feeling yucky.  My lovely neighbors took charge over me at our neighborhood party by taking great care of my kids while I just chilled out.  Countless friends have checked on me and prayed for us during this time too. 
Thank you, thank you, thank you to all of you for your help and support. I am nearly back to normal and have my 2 week check up appointment tomorrow afternoon.  I even will get to drive again!!  I will tell you, it hasn't been fun, but I wouldn't say it is the worst experience ever either.  It definitely gets you down though.  It is a weird thing, but there are waves of light-headedness that just came over me and frequently!  Hmmm, maybe that's one of  the reasons they say don't drive! 
What are my next big plans you wonder  (or maybe not!)  ??  After my appointment on Friday, I plan on picking Jenna up and carrying her around for the rest of the day!  And soon very soon, I hope to eat a wonderful meal at a Mexican restaurant, complete with crunchy chips and spicy salsa!

It's Been a Year...Part 2

I really didn't mean to leave you all hanging last night, as if you don't know the story, but if you noticed the posting time.....well it was 2 hours off, so it was 1:05 when I posted that bad boy and Mama was tired.  I was also emotionally drained.  Anywho, here's where left off....

The scene in the waiting room lightened from the sad, heart breaking scene that was just a floor above.  Somehow, in the cozy waiting room atmosphere, you can go light years from where you really are.  You can snap back into reality in a flash too.  One moment, you are laughing with friends and family, the next moment you hear "Jenna's family" and you are harshly reminded why all these loving people are here providing a distraction with their company.  The kind folks in the operating room called and updated us every hour and half or so.  The updates went something like this:

She went to sleep quickly and Dr. Singhal has just started the surgery.

She is doing great. Everything is on track in here.

She is still doing great. Dr. Singhal is about to finish up.

She did great. He is closing her up now.  He'll be down to see you soon.

Dr. Singhal's report when he came to see us was more of the same.  She did great. We had no problems.  All is repaired, and it went perfectly.  I asked questions, similar to my worries, her eyes are okay?  Her brain is okay?  Her forehead is okay?  YES, YES, YES, it went great, just as expected, just like they planned.  Just like they had done thousands of times on thousands of babies.  But this one was the first time on MY baby, so I wanted to make certain!  We still had longer to wait while she was in recovery.  And then we were reunited.  But first, some fun photos while we were light years away somehow....



This might be my favorite.  I have no story for it besides these guys are hilarious, make us laugh and I love them a lot!



Uncle Eli (apparently SHOCKED at my camera), Aunt Hallie and Great Grandma Mary



War!  He won these rounds, but I could really whoop up on him when he was younger!

There were others with us that day.  Grace Baptist Church had been praying for this girl and this day, and many came to support us with their presence that day.  Of course, our families were there. Also, Rebble, my new cranio mama friend, blessed us by bringing her cranio baby.  Lily Jane, not a baby anymore, stood as a beautiful picture of proof that my Jenna would get through this day and blossom.

After the waiting, there was more waiting, in reunion avenue, and then....

This is the first time we got to see our punkin. Man, she sure was swollen and pale.  You can see her ever faithful best friend Dolly up by her head.  She used Dolly over the next few days to hide from the world. 

After we met Jenna in the hallway from recovery to the PICU (pediatric ICU), we had more waiting.  It was more agonizing, because we had seen her and I just wanted to be with her.  It was over, and this Mama was DONE waiting. 

When we finally got to the room with her, there was one of us with her at all times.  We stayed with her and every little whimper roused us to go check on her all through the night.  I learned a lot that night.  I learned, more than ever, that your kids are like your heart running around outside your body.  It hurt so much to see her like that. No, I don't think she was in pain.  She made some wincing faces now and again, but she slept peacefully most of the night and into the late morning.  We kept up on her pain meds and monitored her every sound, move and possible need. She wasn't in pain, but we were.  My heart ached for her and her puffy little body.  I also learned that while this was painfully agonizing and scary and no fun, our adventure would come to an end soon, and I would take my healthy child home in a few days.  And for at least the immediate future, we would be fine.  There are other families with deep hurts too, up at that hospital right now, sitting in their PICU rooms, holding their breath while doctors work away.  And a lot of them are not quick fixes. They have this pain all the time.  Our was like a sprint, it was a short run, then we were back to normal.  Other families, they are on marathons, and there are some drink breaks along the way, but really they must run a lot more than we had too.  I prayed for them then, I pray for them now, and I hope you will pray for them too. 



Sweet Angel Baby

The next few days were a whirlwind of emotions.  Sometime I will post on my blog my email updates that I sent out that week.  I hope that someone will read this blog and get hope for their cranio baby.  That week was long, I only left once for a hot, non-hospital lunch (and yes, we chose Chipotle).  We had visitors, people checking on through facebook, email and phones and some lovely flowers.  Nurses and doctors came in several times throughout the day, sometimes with updates, or to answer our questions, but mostly always to make sure Jenna was doing perfectly.  But don't think there wasn't any fun. Jenna, for the most part, felt pretty good after that first day.  There was a play room she got to go to. She made us all NERVOUS, but she had a good time.  Also, Cale came to see her, which totally made the girl's day.  Here they are playing cars, IV pole and all!

We got to come home on Saturday, following her Tuesday surgery.  Home was good.  The first thing Jenna did was drink a bottle, something she had refused to do in the hospital.  She actually bought us an extra day with her crazy non-drinking antics!  Here is a picture of her at home that first night, all smiles of course!

 Our sweet girl is great now. One year later, there is barely proof under her beautiful dark wavy hair of a scar line.  Her forehead is perfectly perfect.  She is developing very much on target and is full of SASS!!!  She adores her brother, and likewise, he loves her to the moon and back plus infinity.  We are blessed beyond measure by these 2 sweet babies, the extensions of our hearts.

It's Been a Year...Part 1

It was one year ago today that we brought our little Miss Jenna home from the hospital, for the 2nd time.  April 10, 2010 we were released from Children's Mercy following her Frontal Orbital Advancement on April 6.  Read with me as I reminisce the events that lead up to April 6, that week and now.   HAHAHAHA, those of you that know me well just SIGHED a giant SIGH, so afraid that I will go on and on and on and on....and I might.  You can read this in 2 settings if you need to! 

 I just finished for the night and decided to give you fair warning.  

I didn't get to the end, so you will have to read it in 2 settings....or 3 or 4....

Jenna was born with Metopic Craniosynostosis, which is a fancy word for her plates in her head were fused together and they weren't supposed to be.  We had to get it fixed. Now, if you remember, my baby was a still a complete and utter beauty, even if she had a ridge down her forehead which daddy and I affectionately called her beak.  But that's another story.... 


See, absolutely BEAUTIFUL!! 

 From the start, the very early start, we thought maybe something was not quite right with that little forehead of hers. Within days, the nurses and doctors, bless you Yvonne for prepping us, started talking about craniosynostosis.  Well good grief, between dealing with a 6 week early punkin and all the drugs from the C-section and the whirlwind we call life, this new giant word sounded terrible and I just hoped and prayed they were wrong and she'd grow out of it. Well, Dr. McGinnis gave her just 3 short weeks to "grow out of it" before he referred us to Dr. Virender Singhal, plastic surgeon at Children's Mercy (let's just call it CMH for short, shall we?).   When I called their office, they were able to get us in July 24th, because of our "willingness" to go to the clinic at CM South.

We meet with these blessed souls when Jenna was just day shy of 2 months old. What we found was a very confident and skilled set of doctors, nurses, and staff.  These people do this all the time, this is their normal and they did all they could to make all this whole process as normal and non scary as possible.  At this appointment, we learned all about Jenna's birth defect, how they would fix it and her recovery.  We also learned they didn't want to do her surgery until she was EIGHT TO NINE MONTHS OLD!!!  And that is 8-9 months old from her due date, so 9-10 months old in real counting.  AND we were to call in JANUARY to schedule the surgery.  The wait, it was long. It was hard and painful and scary and odd all at the same time.  I had just waited 7.5 months for something big, now I had to wait another 7 months for another something big. It felt like an eternity, an ever looming date of "early spring" just tempting us with worry and fear.  Yes, I was praying.  And I was talking to others and learning all I could.  I made a new friend whose own baby had gone through this. I got to meet the miracle of Lilly Jane and (BARELY) see her 3 year old scar, the same one my sweet pea has now.  But I didn't receive peace until April 2.  The deacons in our church prayed over my Jenna, our Jenna.  They prayed for healing and God's infinite power and wisdom and I cried and cried and then when the vocal praying stopped, I still cried.  A special brother in Christ prayed with me a few moments later after I shared my ultimate fear, and then it was there....Peace. Peace that passes understanding, I had it like a wave in the ocean, just overwhelming and overtaking.  Remember, I didn't say God didn't give it til then, I said I didn't take it until then....

What were my worries, you wonder?  Or maybe you don't. Maybe you know.  Or thought you knew. My fears, as any parent's would be, were of anesthesia gone bad, freak accidents, those possibilities that are rare, uncommon but yet possible. Would her optic nerves be damaged?  Would her brain get bumped even though they assured us they were FAR from the brain?  (And really how far could one really be from the brain if you are changing the shape of a forehead?)  What if something goes wrong that I haven't even thought of??  And my worst fear, the one I couldn't speak but feared more than all of the above and prayed on fervently, my worst fear was that we would not get her back from that surgery.  I was so terrified to lose my baby.  For me, that surgery date, the unknown for so long, then that date of April 6, April 6, April 6...it was when my world would stop.  For my calendar, there was no April 7 or 8 or 9. I was so afraid of April 6 I couldn't see past it. 

So, April 6th came (and in case you didn't know, the 7th did too, praise the Lord:)  I won't say it was easy since I had his new found peace.  The peace made me a sane person (debatable by some, I know).  We got to the hospital super early that day, they did all kinds of vital checks that morning and my little sweetie just smiled and smiled through most of it. 


She is blissfully unaware of what is going on.  I asked - they would not give me drugs to make ME blissfully unaware!

 Soon all the vitals were taken, all the questions answered, and all the consent forms signed.  There was more praying and more crying, and then the moment no doctor or nurse can prepare you for, the moment of handing your precious baby over to the nurse for her surgery.  This was the HARDEST, MOST DIFFICULT thing I have ever done.  That moment when I had to hand over my Jenna to that nurse, really more that moment when that nurse pulled my sweet baby away from my tight secure mommy grip, oh my, I cannot describe enough the pain. I wasn't standing on my own, Eric was holding me up.  And our wonderful family behind us, supporting him and me, not a dry eye in the crowd, pushed us toward the elevator.  And then we waited...

The Things We do for our Kids

Well, it happened.  One of our scenarios and predictions from our hospital stay in December panned out, and Mommy got the brunt of this one.  You can refresh your memory here, specifically in the "BAD" section.  Turns out I do, I guess DID, carry strep and so I won the prize! Yay for me!!  Insert happy dance here! 

A tonsillectomy was the prize and I received it on Thursday. Dr. Hannah Vargas at Midwest ENT did the honors. I do have to give a shout out to the supporting roles in this win.  My mom, Eric and his mom have gotten to do most of the glorious duty of taking care of me, the house and making sure I am not overdoing it.  I am not supposed to lift or drive for two weeks.  As a result of not being able to lift my tiny 23 pound daughter, she has perfected asking her grandmothers to pick her up by saying a sweet little "up" with her arms lifted high as they go.  And of course, how can they say no?  (By the way Ann, our apologies now, but the little terror is getting held A LOT!) . 

They say, yes there is the infamous they. Who are these "They" people anyway?  THEY say that this is worse for adults than children, way worse.  It could quite possibly be the worst thing ever.  Well, here's what I have to say about that.

1.  Childbirth is worse. The kind where your epidural never really takes and they let it wear off, what little was working, and the kid is twisted and you push for 3 hours, that kind is worse.  The kind where they wisk you to the OR in the middle of the night and you don't have to work for it, well, that kind of childbirth is easier than this.  (No offense c-section mama's, I've had both).

2.  What is up with this pain medication?  Seriously, it has the most rancid flavor every created.  That's a great idea.  Let give something that is hard to swallow to someone who has a horrible time swallowing!  But wait, let's make it so disgusting that they want to vomit and cough, when they have strictly been told NO COUGHING and vomiting would be extremely painful!

3.  Still on the medicine....let's make it constipate a person who is not supposed to exert any energy for any reason!   What a great idea!!!

4.  Ice cream, Sonic slushes, Popsicles and sherbet....a 5 year old's dream diet, NOT mine!

5.  Someone should have told me that it would feel like there is a Kleenex stuck to the back of my throat. 

6. Yes, mashed potatoes get stuck back there when I swallow them.  Yes, I am making them the consistency of water.

7.  Sonic slushes are SWEET!!  Like super sugary syrupy sweet.  Like make me want to gag now kind of sweet.  My tip for future winners of this delightful surgery....get a plain slush.  It is much nicer and more tolerable.  Also, get Sonic ice.  It is great and rivals hospital ice. You can buy it by the bag or 35 cents for 2 large cups of it. 

8.  My hands are FREEZING from holding the bowls and cups of ice cream, sherbet, ice, jello and pudding.  One should have a cozy pair of gloves handy. 

9.  It hurts to talk.  This coming from the queen of gab, I do not like to talk right now. It hurts even more to talk loudly to my children who are crazy insane right now. 

10.  This hurts LESS than the week we spent in the hospital not knowing what was wrong with Jenna.  The constipation, the freezing hands, the boring bland butter soft diet, the disgusting make me want to hurl medicine, the helpless feeling of not being able to care for my babies, the constant pain and ache in my throat, neck and/or ears, none of it is as bad as not knowing what is going on in your baby's head, or watching her hurt and go through procedures and tests and pokes and prods and worrying about her day and night.  That was worse, way worse, than this.   So I guess, if this event prevents another event like the one we had in December, well, I guess that I am the winner.

In other news, today is my darling husband's 39th birthday!!  Let the over the hill jokes begin ladies and gentleman, because Eric is nearly old!!!  We had glorious plans of a romantic candlelit dinner of ice cream and mashed potatoes, but due to last night's hail storm, the poor guy is not even home yet. 

Feel free to comment, as I like to read right now and have nothing else to do.  And a small disclaimer, I am highly drugged and so if things don't make perfect sense, use your best judgement and figure it out.  And Shonda, pick your shocked self up off the ground, yes, its me and I made another post, FINALLY!